Hiten Mitsuruugi Driving School
by Ushuaia
Summary: Kaoru got this flyer and eventually enrolls everyone to a driving school! (even though cars doesn't exist in the Meiji Era) With crazy tutors and a nasty wager to boot, will they be able to survive long enough to try out their licenses?


Standard Disclaimers apply: That means, the characters here are not mine--But I just wished that the bishonens are mine, at least.  
  
  
DRIVING SCHOOL  
  
  
Yahiko, Kaoru, Sano and Kenshin are at Hiten Mitsuurugi Driving School. Kaoru read this driving school from a flyer she received while shopping. However, only Kaoru and Yahiko are eager to go. Sano and Kenshin are not.  
  
Tutor: Okay, everybody! Roll Call! Myoujin Yahiko.  
Yahiko: (enthusiastically) here!  
Tutor: Kamiya Kaoru!  
Kaoru: (enthusiastically) here!  
Tutor: Sanosuke Segara! Himura Kenshin!  
Sano and Kenshin: (gloomily) here. (Although Kenshin smiled to be polite).  
Tutor: Okay! Everybody's here. Let's start.  
  
The tutor lead them to four cars each colored white, pink, green and blue. Beside each cars have different tutors.  
  
Tutor: Okay! Here are your cars. You have your own respective tutor to teach you hands-on. Now if you could just please pick your own car and…hey! What are you doing?!  
  
Yahiko is poking inside the green car's engine.  
  
Yahiko: What is this? (Poking around the cables) how come there are fans here?  
Tutor: Quit messing with the engine kid! (After swatting Yahiko's hands off the car) Okay…where was I? Oh yes! Now pick your own car and the respective tutor will teach you how to drive.  
  
Yahiko picked the green one. The tutor's name is Tsubame. Both of them blushed.  
Sano picked the white one. Megumi was in charge.  
Sano: I know this is a dumb idea. Especially spending this time with loud mouth here (refers to Megumi).  
  
SPANK!!!  
  
Megumi claps her hands as if taking the dust off them. While behind her is Sano with a big red spot on his left cheek.  
Sano: Her slaps are even worse than Anji's punches!  
  
  
Kaoru picked the pink one. The tutor is Misao.   
  
And finally…   
  
Kenshin picked the blue one. The tutor is…Shishio? (ORO!)   
  
Tutor: Okay. Now you guys have fun. Bye!   
  
The tutor left, leaving behind the four in their fate.   
  
After a while, it seems that Yahiko and Tsubame are 'hitting' it off---through driving.  
Kaoru and Misao are doing fine, except…  
Kaoru: Misao, what made you decide to get in this driving school? I didn't even know you know how to drive?  
Misao: Well, my reason is simple…Aoshi! I want to impress him! (Then her eyes pop hearts and sighs dreamily, losing her grip on the wheel).  
The car swerves uncontrollably.  
Kaoru: Misao! Misao! Okay! I got your point! (Then she thought silently) Next time, I'm not going to mention Aoshi. My life depended on it.  
  
Sano had his arms crossed and his eyes are all droopy. He had been waiting for Megumi all day.  
Sano: What's taking her so long?  
  
Meanwhile, Megumi is in the head tutor's office, complaining.  
Megumi: Why do I have to tutor that no good Sano!  
Tutor: Calm down, Megumi-san, calm down. I don't have any choice. You are supposed to tutor him.  
Megumi: But…  
Tutor: No 'buts', Megumi-san. I thought you want to earn up enough money to build your own clinic.  
Megumi's face fell. Just then, a strange male voice came from behind her. The voice was so familiar that sends chills through her spine.  
Strange Voice: I'll do it, Megumi-san.  
For the first time, she was so happy that he came.  
Megumi: (evil snicker) He'll do.  
  
Later…  
Sano: What?!  
Saito: (pulls out a stick of cigarette and lit it up) Megumi-san can't make it. She's sick.  
Sano: NOOO!!!  
  
Kenshin swerves easily on the left turn. It seems that having Shishio as a driving tutor is not so bad after all.  
Kenshin: So, Shishio-sama, what decides you to be a tutor in this driving school.  
Shishio: You don't need to know.  
Kenshin: But why?  
Shishio: You don't need to know.  
Kenshin: But why?  
Shishio: You don't need to know.  
Kenshin: But why?  
Shishio: You don't need to know.  
Reader: ^.^;  
Kenshin: But---  
Shishio: Okay! Okay! I give up! The reason why I worked in a driving school is that I could conquer more lands this way (to the audience---out of Kenshi's earshot) and also have a revenge on Kenshin by failing him, hahaha!  
  
Final tests came…this will decide if they will have a license or not. (Or something else)  
  
Tutor: Okay! Students ready!  
The Kenshin-gumi lined up with their cars. Then one by one, they got in. The head tutor gave Shishio, Saito, Misao, and Tsubame the test instructions they need for this day. The test instructions are the ways their students have to follow to be able to pass.  
  
Kaoru: This is going to be a cinch! It's like I'm doing Kendo.  
Misao: Now remember Kaoru, I'm not going to be easy on you on this one. Aoshi's watching (then waves at Aoshi outside the track).  
  
Aoshi wrote down something on his pad. He acts as if he doesn't see her.  
  
Kaoru: Okay, let's just get this over with.  
  
Misao: Turn right on the next corner. Good. Now go straight. Change gears. No, I said change gears. There. Red light. I said 'red light'. Kaoru! Kaoru! KAORU!!!!  
WHAM!  
  
Saito: Now look what you did Sano. That's ten points' deduction.  
Sano: You are really ticking me off! I'll just beat you right here and now!  
Saito: That's another ten points deduction.  
Sano: *arghhh*  
Misao: Hey, look what you guys did. You destroyed the bumper of our car.  
  
Saito emerges. Misao's face changes.  
  
Misao: ^-^; hehehe. Saito, I didn't know you are tutoring here.  
Saito: It's my part time job.  
  
Misao immediately got in the car and drives off.  
  
Meanwhile, in Kenshin's car…  
  
Kenshin: This…is fun.   
Shishio: I know (grins evilly).  
Kenshin: I wonder what the others are doing...  
Shishio: Okay, let's start. First let's check if everything's okay.  
Kenshin goes up front and opens the hood. He pokes while Shishio watches with an evil grin.  
Half of Kenshin's body is now seen as submerged inside the contraption (Kenshin is small, isn't he). Anyway, he was mumbling halfway between "This is interesting" and "Why the hell do I have to do this anyway, de gozaro yo. Can't "ol' mummy face" do this by himself?"  
Then, Shishio started the engine while Kenshin is still inside.  
Kenshin quickly jumped out.  
"Hey!!!"  
Shishio snapped his fingers. "Shoot! That was close!"  
"I think you did that on purpose."  
"I didn't do anything."  
"Yes, you did," Kenshin approached Shishio, who was still in the car. "Why don't you fix this yourself."  
"You're my student," he said, "why are you ordering me around?"  
"You're suppose to be dead. Why are you still here?"  
Silence.  
Finally, Shishio came out of the car. "Okay, what do you want, Hitokiri?"  
"Fix the car."  
"Don't order me around."  
But, eventually, Shishio peered over the engine and tried to do the check-up himself, while Kenshin sat on the driver's seat.  
Shishio, who was still peering, then shouted at Kenshin,"now start the car."  
Kenshin revved up the engine.   
"Not when I'm IN it!!" Shishio shouted. Good thing, he was out.  
"Sorry..."  
He didn't know, that one of his bandages got stuck in the engine.  
Shishio got in the passenger's seat, "There. Satisfied? Am I still decieving you?"  
"I guess you really have changed," Kenshin said.  
Heh. Yeah right.  
Kenshin started the engine and drives off--without knowing that one of Shishio's bandage got stuck in the fan of the radiator...slowly rolling away like tissue paper...  
  
By the end of the day, Sano, Kaoru and Misao met at the starting point of the course. Saito had already given Sano's tests results to HQ, then went home to Tokio. While Misao "borrowed" the car and searched for Aoshi.  
Just then, Yahiko and Tsubame approached them. Finally, they came out of "hiding".  
Kaoru: I thought you're not going to show up.  
Sano ruffled Yahiko's hair, "you are really one dirty kid."  
Yahiko: Hey! We didn't do anything wrong.  
Tsubame: Actually...he was a little...shy and...  
Yahiko: ...frustrated.  
Tsubame: ^-^  
Suddenly, Kaoru and Sano pulled Yahiko out of Tsubame's earshot. The two "adults" hovering around him.  
"What DID you guys do?" Kaoru demanded.  
"This is a school...of course...kids DO learn something," Sano proposes.  
Kaoru did her mega-punch on Sano...instead on Kenshin.  
"Why is it that this day, I was always whacked by demented girls."  
Kaoru whacked him again.  
"Just like I said, "demented"..."  
Before Kaoru could whack him again, Yahiko interfered.  
"Hello..." he waved, "I'm explaining my side here."  
"Okay," Sano was rubbing where Kaoru whacked him. "Shoot."  
"We got lost" the kid said flatly.  
"Elaborate."  
"We were driving around the course with me on the wheel and the course map with Tsubame," he said. "We were deep in the woods when we realized that Tsubame had the map upside down."  
"That's ridiculous," Sano laughed, "But still...did you make a MOVE?"  
"I did not!!!!"  
"Then can you explain the blushing!" Kaoru asked.  
"She kept calling me Yahiko-chan!" He explained. "You know I don't like when she call me that!"  
"The 'chan' has a point." Gestures at Yahiko.  
Yahiko had his bamboo sword pointed at Sano.  
Sano backed away, his hands raised, but he still have that teasing smile plastered on his face, "Take it easy."  
"Okay," Kaoru finally said, "so you didn't do anything?"  
Yahiko shook his head.  
"You really got lost?"  
Again, he nod his head.  
"He really called you "chan"?"  
Again, he nod his head. But this time, he got a little irritated.  
"You REALLY didn't do anything?"  
He shook his head, "I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!!!"  
"Wow, Kaoru," Sano said, "I don't know you can be pretty annoying."  
It was Yahiko's turn to torture. "She's always annoying."  
"Do you want me to punch you instead," Kaoru pulled up her sleeves.  
"Yahiko, Kaoru's just being a mother to you," Sano said, "you should have a little respect."  
Kaoru nods with pride.  
"You should always be considerate that she had taken you to this driving school for free."  
Kaoru nods again.  
"You should be thankful that she's teaching you Kamiya Kasshin."  
"You should be grateful that she is letting you sleep and eat in her house."  
"Therefore," he said finally, "You should have a little respect...take care of her when she gets sick...obey her biddings..."  
Kaoru's grin keeps getting wider and wider.  
"...stay still and keep quiet when she rants in the house...don't tell her that she looks fat in her kimono she's wearing now because that will hurt her feelings...don't tell her that Kenshee sees her as an invisible hopeless romantic..."  
  
WHAM!  
  
"You dumb gangster..." Kaoru had her sleeves right up to her shoulders, veins popping in her forehead and fist, and it seems like she is puffing like a dragon (what?).  
"Why are you getting mad at?" Sano said dusting dirt off his shirt, "I thought you like being on a pedestal?"  
"But I'm not fat and not a hopeless romantic!!" She screamed.  
"But you are a hopeless romantic!" Sano replied.  
"What about Megumi? Don't tell me there's nothing between you two!" She retaliated.  
"That foxy chick!" Sano exclaimed. "Yeah, she's a good doctor, but that is not a reason that I would fall for her!"  
"After all, if you put away those medicine stuff, there's nothing left but a loud mouth, annoying fox ears, and irritating..." Sano put his left hand on his right cheek with the palm facing the right, "LAUGH!!!!!OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!!!!"  
Then somebody whacked him from behind.  
"If you really want to die in the hands of a lady doctor, Sano," a familiar voice said, "keep it up."  
"EEP! MEGUMI!!!"  
Megumi was standing behind him, a huge nerve on her forehead. "Fortunately, I have my surgical equipment with me in case somebody got a car accident. I could do an autopsy right here and now if you want to."  
Sano backed a step away, "Hehehe....can't you take a joke..."  
"Doctors don't joke."  
Sano gulped.  
"Hey! Hey!" Yahiko, after watching the three for a long time, finally interrupted.  
"I have an idea. If you really want to get even with Sano, Kaoru...or Kaoru, if you want him to pay you back from his insults...If Sano fails, he will date Megumi..."  
Megumi butts in, "Why do I have to be in it!"  
Anyway, he continued, "but if Kaoru loses..."  
"She'll be my slave for a week. She'll clean my house. And everyday, I'll be free from every food I order!" Sano interrupted.  
"Okay." Yahiko agrees.  
"Wait a minute! He decides my punishment and I didn't," then Kaoru smiled, "then again...Saito wanted to see you fail miserably..."  
"Oh no! I forgot about that!"   
Then Megumi asked, "What if it was a draw?"  
"Then you decide, Megumi-san." Yahiko said.   
"Hmmm...that doesn't sound so bad." Megumi said. "So, everybody agree on the terms."  
Sano, Kaoru and Yahiko's hand overlapped in the center. "We're in!" They said in unison.  
Then Megumi's hand rested on top of the three. "Then it's a deal."  
  
Five o'clock in the afternoon. Everybody was already at the HQ waiting for the results. It seems that Misao had found Aoshi, and had been clinging on him for hours now. Sano and Kaoru looked at each other with hostility, while Yahiko shook his head in disappointment.  
"And they call themselves adults?"  
While Megumi have a huge grin plastered on her face. It seems that she is sure that Sano's going to get it---whether he fails or not (hidden plan? I dunno...). Saito, on the other hand, lights another cigarette nonchalantly.  
"Where is Mr. Himura and Mr. Makoto(?)?" asks Tsubame.  
"You're right." Kaoru's face changes to worry. "They've been out long enough."  
"Do you think they had a showdown?"  
"Then we should have seen smoke rising up to the air." Yahiko said.  
"Wait!" Megumi exclaimed while pointing somewhere. "There is Ken-san."  
"Don't...call him...KEN-SAN!" Kaoru growled.  
"I'm just getting warmed up." Megumi teased.  
"Konnichiwa!" Himura greeted everybody. His face was red. But why?  
"Where have you been?" Kaoru asked.  
"Where's Matchstick?"  
Himura snickered.  
Just then, the head tutor emerges from the HQ Building.  
"Okay, everybody! Here are the results!" He said excitedly.  
"Finally," Sano said. Everybody was also saying the same thing.  
"Okay!" The Head Tutor opened the envelope and pulled out a slip of paper. A drum roll echoed in the background.  
Head Tutor: Thank You, Soujirou!  
Soujirou: ^-^ you're welcome.  
Head Tutor: Okay! The people who passed are....  
A sweat trickled down Sano's face.  
Yahiko crossed his fingers. I bet he crossed his toes, too.  
Megumi and Kaoru intertwined their fingers together, anticipating the announcement...anticipating the winners...don't want to expect the worse...  
While Himura still have that smile on his face.   
"Yahiko Myoujin!"  
"YEY!!!" Yahiko cheered. "I'm clear."  
"But you are going to get your license when you get to be 18 years old." The head tutor explained. "But since you are a student of Kamiya Kasshin style, I'm going to grant you a student license."  
"It's okay. At least I'm not going to be tortured..." Yahiko trailed off.  
"Oro?" Kenshin asked.  
"You'll find out soon enough. Meanwhile, let's hear who's going to "pass" next." Yahiko said.  
Another drum roll from Soujirou. HT (head tutor) pulled another envelope and pulled out a slip of paper.  
"Kamiya Kaoru!!!!"  
"YEEESSSSSS!!!!!!!!!" Kaoru clapped her hands in the air. Finally, she sighed deeply.   
However, Megumi snapped her fingers, "Tsk! Just too close."  
"Only two are left." HT said. "However, I have only one passing student and unfortunately, one failed."  
"AHA!" Kaoru exclaimed. "Better find something to wear, Sano. I'm going to set you and Megumi up."  
But Sano didn't lack faith. "Don't let your hopes up, Kaoru. There's still one who will pass. And that might be me!"  
"Hm." Kaoru was smiling.  
But if Sano passes, at least I have a back-up plan, Megumi introspects.  
Another drum roll. And again, HT pulls out the deciding factor of Sano's future.  
But would it be a bright...or grim one?  
HT was about to announce the winner when he halted. "But I want to know if you want to hear the loser first."  
"JUST GET ON WITH IT!!!!!!" Sano shouted impatiently.  
"Very well..." HT said. "The one who will take summer classes would be..."  
Cross your fingers, audience. This is JUDGEMENT DAY!!!  
"HIMURA KENSHINNN!!!!!!"  
"WHAAAAAAAATTTTTTT!!!!!!!" Kaoru gasped.  
"Oro?" Himura just stayed there, frozen. "I...I...never lose a battle before...or anything...."  
However, Megumi seemed to like the way things are going. "Well, well, well..." she teased Kaoru.  
Kaoru turned blue and all down. Now everything lies on the witch's hands.  
"A draw?" Yahiko looked confused. "I was expecting Sano to fail."  
"Well, he didn't," Saito said from behind while puffing carcinogenic smoke. What is he doing here? Yahiko thought.  
"So it means that Sanosuke Segara passes," HT finally said. "I hope you like your licenses."  
Then he darts away in a flash to catch the series of Samurai X.  
"I still don't get it." Himura said to himself. "I was sure I have all the cards in my hands."  
"But I guess you lost it all," Sano said with a smile on his face.   
"Anyway, where have you been? What happened to Mr. Gasoline Man?"  
That returned his smile back. But not as happy as before. "I'll tell you when we get back."  
Meanwhile, Yahiko was fanning Kaoru to consciousness. "Get a grip Kaoru. It's only a bet."  
"But you don't have any idea what she could do with it..." she said in grief.  
It seems that Megumi was all happy about it. She was rubbing her palms together as if the last step is a success. Behind her is Saito, flicking his cigarette.  
I still don't get Saito's being here, Yahiko thought to himself.  
"Well..." Megumi finally said---fox ears and all. "Do you want to know what I had in mind, Kaoru."  
"No....." the deranged Kaoru trailed off.  
"Do you want to know my decisions on this bet," she teased again.  
"What's happening? What bet?" Himura approached them, with Sano following close behind.  
"Since you are all curious about it---and I'm sure you are---I'll just spill it, okay?" She said and motions at Saito.  
"Since Sano insulted me earlier, I'll let Saito handle his punishment."  
It was Sano's turn to freeze.  
"NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"  
Yahiko's face lit up, "I knew it!!!"  
"And since I was the deciding factor on this bet....Kaoru's punishment will be...."  
Silence. Anticipation. And Sweatdrops.  
"ME AND KEN-SAN WILL HAVE A ONE-DAY DATE!!!!!OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!!!!!!!"  
"NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" Kaoru screamed.  
"ORO???NANI?????"  
  
Today seemed like any other normal day for our Kenshin-gumi.  
Saito pleased himself of torturing Sano.  
Misao still have Aoshi.  
Yahiko now knows how to drive a car so that he could pick up and fetch Tsubame to and from the restaurant. (So that's it!)  
Megumi, at last, have Kenshin all to himself---With Kaoru crying all day for the loss.  
Like I said, "normal" day......  
And everybody lived happily ever after.  
  
END  
  
Wait a minute!!! What happened to Shishio-sama? Well, I'll just leave the question for you guys to answer.  
For now, leave these things be. 


End file.
